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Quotes About Cats

"You can't help that. We're all mad here." - The Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland
"No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to be plenty of kittens." Abraham Lincoln
"Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat." Mark Twain
"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior." Hippolyte Taine
Actually, cats do this to protect you from gnomes who come and steal your breath while you sleep. -- John Dobbin
Don't think that I'm silly for liking it, I just happen to like the simple little things, and I love cats! -- Michelle Gardner
Everything I know I learned from my cat: When you're hungry, eat. When you're tired, nap in a sunbeam. When you go to the vet's, pee on your owner. -- Gary Smith
I'm aloof, I like to run around outside, but I also like to curl up in warm spots. I eat fish. -- Megan Coughlin on why she'd make a good cat
The naming of cats is a difficult matter. It isn't just one of your holiday games. You may think at first I'm mad as a hatter. When I tell you a cat must have three different names... -- T.S. Eliot
The sun rose slowly, like a fiery furball coughed up uneasily onto a sky-blue carpet by a giant unseen cat. -- Michael McGarel
We need a word for all the kitty-prints that are all over my windshield because the cats like to lie on my hood when the car is still warm. -- Megan Coughlin
You can visualize a hundred cats. Beyond that, you can't. Two hundred, five hundred, it all looks the same. -- Jack Wright (of Kingston, Ontario, the Guinness Book record holder for the owner of the most cats at one time [689])
You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat. -- Albert Einstein, when asked to describe radio
"After scolding one's cat one looks into its face and is seized by the ugly suspicion that it understood every word. And has filed it for reference."--Charlotte Gray
"A dog will flatter you but you have to flatter the cat."--George Mikes
"You can keep a dog; but it is the cat who keeps people, because cats find humans useful domestic animals."--George Mikes
"You own a dog but you feed a cat."--Jenny de Vries
"One is never sure, watching two cats washing each other, whether it's affection, the taste or a trial run for the jugular."--Helen Thomson
"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this." Anonymous
"A cat sees no good reason why it should obey another animal, even if it does stand on two legs."--Sarah Thompson
"Cats are kindly masters, just so long as you remember your place."--Paul Gray
"One must love a cat on its own terms."--Paul Gray
"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later." Mary Bly
"I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals." Winston Churchill
I have noticed that what cats most appreciate in a human being is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted--but his or her entertainment value. Geoffrey Household
If a dog jumps into your lap it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing it is because your lap is warmer. A. N. Whitehead
Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want. Joseph Wood Krutch
I love cats because I enjoy my home; and little by little, they become its visible soul. Jean Cocteau
With the qualities of cleanliness, affection, patience, dignity, and courage that cats have, how many of us, I ask you, would be capable of becoming cats? Fernand Mery
When I play with my cat, who knows if I am not a pastime to her more than she is to me? Montaigne
There is, incidently, no way of talking about cats that enables one to come off as a sane person. Dan Greenberg
No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch. Leo Dworken
Cats can be cooperative when something feels good, which, to a cat, is the way everything is supposed to feel as much of the time as possible. Roger Caras
Like a graceful vase, a cat, even when motionless, seems to flow. George F. Will
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose. Garrison Keillor
By and large, people who enjoy teaching animals to roll over will find themselves happier with a dog. Barbara Holland
A meow massages the heart. Stuart McMillan
Cats are the ultimate narcissists. You can tell this by all the time they spend on personal grooming. Dogs aren't like this. A dog's idea of personal grooming is to roll in a dead fish. James Gorman
If we treated everyone we meet with the same affection we bestow upon our favorite cat, they, too, would purr. Martin Buxbaum
Cats always know whether people like or dislike them. They do not always care enough to do anything about it. Winifred Carriere
If a cat does something, we call it instinct; if we do the same thing, for the same reason, we call it intelligence. Will Cuppy
The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. P. G. Wodehouse
Cats' hearing apparatus is built to allow the human voice to easily go in one ear and out the other. Stephen Baker
Prowling his own quiet backyard or asleep by the fire, he is still only a whisker away from the wilds. Jean Burden
The mathematical probability of a common cat doing exactly as it pleases is the one scientific absolute in the world. Lynn M. Osband
Cats do not have to be shown how to have a good time, for they are unfailing ingenious in that respect. James Mason
Meow is like aloha - it can mean anything. Hank Ketchum
Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well. Missy Dizick
As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat. Ellen Perry Berkeley
How we behave toward cats here below determines our status in heaven. Robert A. Heinlein
Cats know how to obtain food without labor, shelter without confinement, and love without penalties. W. L. George
As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind. Cleveland Amory
Two things are aesthetically perfect in the world - the clock and the cat. Emile Auguste Chartier
Even the stupidest cat seems to know more than any dog. Eleanor Clark
Kittens are born with their eyes shut. They open them in about six days, take a look around, then close them again for the better part of their lives. Stephen Baker
A cat has absolute emotional honesty: human beings, for one reason or another, may hide their feelings, but a cat does not. Ernest Hemingway
If animals could speak the dog would be a a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. Mark Twain
The smallest feline is a masterpiece. Leonardo da Vinci
There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. Albert Schweitzer
You can't own a cat. The best you can do is be partners. Sir Harry Swanson
There are no ordinary cats. Colette
A cat pours his body on the floor like water. It is restful just to see him. William Lyon Phelps
There are few things in life more heartwarming than to be welcomed by a cat. Tay Hohoff
One reason we admire cats is for their proficiency in one-upmanship. They always seem to come out on top, no matter what they are doing, or pretend they do. Barbara Webster
The ideal of calm exists in a sitting cat. Jules Reynard
Most beds sleep up to six cats. Ten cats without the owner. Stephen Baker
Of all animals, he alone attains to the Contemplative Life. Andrew Lang
The cat is domestic only as far as suits its own ends... Saki (H. H. Munro)
We cannot without becoming cats, perfectly understand the cat mind. St. George Mivart
Most cats, when they are Out want to be In, and vice versa, and often simultaneously. Louis F. Camuti, DVM
The phrase "domestic cat" is an oxymoron. George F. Will
By associating with the cat, one only risks becoming richer. Colette
Intelligence in the cat is underrated. Louis Wain
Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them. Jim Davis
Her function is to sit and be admired. Georgina Strickland Gates
I believe cats to be spirits come to earth. A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through. Jules Verne
Of all animals, the cat alone attains to the comtemplative life. He regards the wheel of existence from without, like the Buddha. Andrew Lang
There is no more intrepid explorer than a kitten. Jules Champfleury
If a cat did not put a firm paw down now and then, how could his human remain possessed. Winifred Carriere
One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are when you don't come home at night. Margaret Mead
"Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes!" - Theophile Gautier
"If you are worthy of its affection, a cat will be your friend, but never your slave."--Theophile Gautier
Cats are a mysterious kind of folk. There is more passing in their minds than we are aware of." - Sir Walter Scott
"Cats are a tonic, they are a laugh, they are a cuddle, they are at least pretty just about all of the time and beautiful some of the time."--Roger Caras
"As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows, cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human mind." - Cleveland Amory
"The cat seldom interferes with other people's rights. His intelligence keeps him from doing many of the fool things that complicate life." - Carl Van Vechten
"Even overweight, cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim poses." - John Weitz
"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow." - Jeff Valdez
"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." - Anonymous
"Cats are glorious creatures ~ who must on no accounts be underestimated...
Their eyes are fathomless depths of cat-world mysteries.
- Lesley Anne Ivory (from Glorious Cats, The Paintings of Lesley Anne Ivory)
"I put down my book, The Meaning of Zen, and see the cat smiling into her fur as she delicately combs it with her rough pink tongue.
Cat, I would lend you this book to study but it appears you have already read it.
She looks up and gives me her full gaze.
Don't be ridiculous, she purrs, I wrote it.
- from "Miao" by Dilys Laing
"A cat sees us as the dogs...A cat sees himself as the human." --Unknown
"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a lot of ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia." --Joseph Wood Crutch
"You can not look at a sleeping cat and feel tense." --Jane Pauley
"There is the little matter of disposal of droppings in which the cat is far ahead of its rivals. The dog is somehow thrilled by what he or any of his friends have produced, hates to leave it, adores smelling it, and sometimes eats it...The cat covers it up if he can..." --Paul Gallico
"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." --Unknown
"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart" --Ernest Menaul
"The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an axe murderer." --Paula Poundstone
"We have a theory that cats are planning to take over the world, just try to look them straight in the eye...yup, they're hiding something!" --Dog Fancy
"When you are looking, a cat acts like a princess, but the minute they think you are not looking, a cat acts like a fool." --KC Buffington
"Cats are designated friends." --Norman Corwin
Civilization is defined by the pesence of cats." --Unknown
"One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives." --Mark Twain
"The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it." --Doug Larson
"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat." --Ellen Perry Berkeley
"His mind is like a steel trap--full of mice." --Foghorn Leghorn
"The really great thing about cats is their endless variety. One can pick a cat to fit almost any kind of decor, color, scheme, income, personality, mood. But under the fur, whatever color it may be, there still lies, essentially unchanged, one of the world's free souls." --Eric Gurney
"I found out why cats drink out of the toilet. My mother told me it's because the water is cold in there. And I'm like: How did my mother know that?" --Wendy Liebman
"Prose book are the show dogs I breed and sell to support my cat." --Robert Graves
"Winners are different. They're a different breed of cat." --Byron Nelson
"The smart cat doesn't let on that he is." --H.G. Frommer
"Cats are notoriously sore losers. Coming in second best, especially to someone as poorly coordinated as a human being, grates their sensibility." --Stephen Baker
Cats do care. For example they know instinctively what time we have to be at work in the morning and they wake us up twenty minutes before the alarm goes off." --Michael Nelson
"It always gives me a shiver when I see a cat seeing what I can't see." --Eleanor Farjeon
"The phrase 'domestic cat' is an oxymoron." --George Will
"If you yell at a cat, you're the one who is making a fool of yourself." --Unknown
"Of all domestic animals the cat is the most expressive. His face is capable of showing a wide range of expressions. His tail is a mirror of his mind. His gracefulness is surpassed only by his agility. And, along with all these, he has a sense of humor." --Walter Chandoha
"A dog is like a liberal, he wants to please everybody. A cat doesn't really need to know that everybody loves him." --William Kunstler
"An ordinary kitten will ask more questions than any five year old." --Carl Van Vechten
"The reason cats climb is so that they can look down on almost every other animal...its also the reason they hate birds." --KC Buffington
"Essentially, you do not so much teach your cat as bribe him." --Lynn Hollyn
"There are few things in life more heart warming than to be welcomed by a cat." --Tay Hohoff
"It is remarkable, in cats, that the outer life they reveal to their masters is one of perpetual boredom." --Robley Wilson, Jr.
"Way down deep we are all motivated by the same urges, cats have the courage to live by them." --Jim Davis
"Two cats can live as cheaply as one, and their owner has twice as much fun." --Lloyd Alexander
"There is no cat 'language'. Painful as it is for us to admit, they don't need one." --Barbara Holland
"Time spent with cats is never wasted." --May Sarton
"The furry little buggers [cats] are just deep, deep wells you throw your emotions into." --Bruce Schimmel
"Cats can work out mathematically the exact place to sit that will cause most inconvenience."--Pam Brown
"Cats have an infallible understanding of total concentration--and get between you and it."--Arthur Bridges
"A kitten is so flexible that she is almost double; the hind parts are equivalent to another kitten with which the forepart plays. She does not discover that her tail belongs to her until you tread on it."--Henry David Thoreau
"If the pull of the outside world is strong, there is also a pull towards the human. The cat may disappear on its own errands, but sooner or later, it returns once again for a little while, to greet us with its own type of love. Independent as they are, cats find more than pleasure in our company."--Lloyd Alexander
"Cat said, 'I am not a friend, and I am not a Servant. I am the Cat who walks by himself, and I wish to come into your Cave.'"--Rudyard Kipling, from the "Just-So Stories"
To err is human, to purr is feline. -Robert Byrne
If you want to know the character of a man, find out what his cat thinks of him. -Anonymous
Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet.- Colette
The ideal of calm exists in a sitting cat.- Jules Reynard
If cats could talk, they wouldn't.- Nan Porter
Every life should have nine cats.-Anonymous
Dogs eat. Cats dine.- Ann Taylor
...You are my cat and I am your human. - Hilaire Belloc
I've met many thinkers and many cats, but the wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.-Hippolyte Taine
A cat is there when you call her - if she doesn't have something better to do.- Bill Adler
Since each of us is blessed with only one life, why not live it with a cat?- Robert Stearns
A cat can purr its way out of anything.- Donna McCrohan
My cat does not talk as respectfully to me as I do to her.- Colette
It is in their eyes that their magic resides.- Arthur Symons
A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution.- Hazel Nicholson
A dog is a dog, a bird is a bird, and a cat is a person.-Mugsy Peabody
Some cats is blind, And stone-deaf some, But ain't no cat Wuz ever dumb.- Anthony Euwer
"The cat has been described as the most perfect animal, the acme of muscular perfection and the supreme example in the animal kingdom of the coordination of mind and muscle."--Roseanne Ambrose Brown
"Poets generally love cats--because poets have no delusions about their own superiority."--Marion Garretty
"Everything a cat is and does physically is to me beautiful, lovely, stimulating, soothing, attractive and an enchantment."--Paul Gallico, from "An Honourable Cat"
"I think one reason we admire cats, those of us who do, is their proficience in one-upmanship. They always seem to come out on top, no matter what they are doing--or pretend to do. Rarely do you see a cat discomfited. They have no conscience, and they never regret. Maybe we secretly envy them."--Barbara Webster, from "Creatures and Contentmets"
"Any cat who misses a mouse pretends it was aiming for the dead leaf."--Charlotte Gray
"If your cat falls out of a tree, go indoors to laugh."--Patricia Hitchcock
French novelist Colette was a firm cat-lover. When she was in the U.S. she saw a cat sitting in the street. She went over to talk to it and the two of them mewed at each other for a friendly minute. Colette turned to her companion and exclaimed, "Enfin! Quelqu'un qui parle francais." (At last! Someone who speaks French!) --Anonymous
"A cat isn't fussy--just so long as you remember he likes his milk in the shallow, rose-patterned saucer and his fish on the blue plate. From which he will take it, and eat it off the floor."--Arthur Bridges
"It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens (Alice had once made the remark) that whatever you say to them, they /always/ purr."--Lewis Carroll
"One small cat changes coming home to an empty house to coming home."--Pam Brown
"To some blind souls all cats are much alike. To a cat lover every cat from the beginning of time has been utterly and amazingly unique."--Jenny de Vries
"There are people who reshape the world by force or argument, but the cat just lies there, dozing, and the world quietly reshapes itself to suit his comfort and convenience."--Allen and Ivy Dodd
"Places to look: behind the books in the bookshelf, any cupboard with a gap too small for any cat to squeeze through, the top of anything sheer, under anything too low for a cat to squash under and inside the piano."--Roseanne Ambrose-Brown
"A cat can maintain a position of curled up somnolence on your knee until you are nearly upright. To the last minute she hopes your conscience will get the better of you and you will settle down again."--Pam Brown
"Cats like doors left open--in case they change their minds."--Rosemary Nisbet
"Many a cat can only be lured in by switching off all the lights and keeping very still. Until the indignant cry of a cat-locked-out comes at the door."--Pam Brown
"The trouble with sharing one's bed with cats is that they'd rather sleep on you than beside you."--Pam Brown
"A cat allows you to sleep on the bed. On the edge."--Jenny de Vries
"All cats like being the focus of attention."--Peter Gray
"When I play with my cat, who knows if I am not a pastime to her more than she is to me?"--Michel E. de Monaigne
"People meeting for the first time suddenly relax if they find they both have cats. And plunge into anecdote."--Charlotte Gray
"Nobody who is not prepared to spoil cats will get from them the reward they are able to give to those who do spoil them."--Compton MacKenzie
"If you shamefully misuse a cat once she will always maintain a dignified reserve toward you afterward. You will never get her full confidence again." ~ Mark Twain
"It's very hard to be polite if you're a cat." ~ Anonymous
"When addressed, a gentleman cat does not move a muscle. He looks as if he hasn't heard." ~ Mary Sarton
"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." ~ Robert A. Heinlein
"Again I must remind you that a dog's a dog--a cat's a cat." ~ T. S. Eliot
"Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes!" ~ Theophile Gautier
"It is in the nature of cats to do a certain amount of unescorted roaming." ~ Adlai Stevenson
"Most cats do not approach humans recklessly. The possibility of concealed weapons, clods or sticks, tend to make them reserved. Homeless cats in particular--with some justification, unfortunately--consider humans their natural enemies. Much ceremony must be observed, and a number of diplomatic feelers put out, before establishing a state of truce." ~ Lloyd Alexander
"The cat of the slums and alleys, starved, outcast, harried, ... still displays the self-reliant watchfulness which man has never taught it to lay aside." ~ Saki
"When I play with my cat, who knows if I am not a pastime to her more than she to me?" ~ Montaigne
"The smart cat doesn't let on that he is." ~ H. G. Frommer
"When anyone mistreats it, the cat wants nothing more to do with that person and will remember him or her for a long time. It doesn't believe in the doctrine of turning the other cheek and won't pretend that it does." ~ Lawrence N. Johnson
"A cat is the only domestic animal I know who toilet trains itself and does a damned impressive job of it." ~ Joseph Epstein
"I purr, therefore I am." ~ Anonymous
"Cats are living adornments." ~ Edwin Lent
"What greater gift than the love of a cat?" ~ Charles Dickens
"People that don't like cats haven't met the right one yet." ~ Deborah A. Edwards, D.V.M.
"I called my cat William because no shorter name fits the dignity of his character. Poor old man, he has fits now, so I call him Fitz-William." ~ Josh Billings

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